View this post on Instagram When I met my @tamarbraxton 12 months ago she was angry, distraught and almost-completely broken. She'd lost her family, her friends, her job and was estranged from her mom and sisters who she loves so much. While her behavior was a significant cause of these misfortunes, it took me a while to recognize that there were other equally valid causes, including being repeatedly assaulted by men in her life she trusted (first physically as a child, then emotionally later on in life by deeply aggressive and utterly controlling romantic relationships); finally culminating in the continuing psychological damage brought on by working on a TV show she feels utterly shackled to due to contract terms. This is what I inherited so I had a choice: to continue the emotional and psychological abuse she had endured for almost 3 decades by being aggressively controlling and manipulative or to be a kind, gentle and loving friend and lover to the woman I love- Well, I chose the latter, and the results have been outstanding! With few exceptions the anger has been replaced by joy, the despair has morphed into a need to help the abused (check out #NoNeedTBShame), and the kind, gentle, beautiful and self-assured woman that is my @tamarbraxton is now on full display (check out our social media activities over the past 3 months since the show was shot and see the new Tamar)! A word to our strong black men who are in relationships with our beautiful black women- when you make a commitment to love that sista, it is your duty and responsibility to STAND BY YOUR WOMAN. PERIOD! Irrespective of wealth, power or fame, many of our women have endured the same challenges that my Tamar has, including physical and emotional abuse, endemic marginalization, controlling romantic relationships and desertion by black men. Some of what many have condescendingly coined as #AngryBlackWoman is simply a reflection of, and reaction to, the life experiences of our beautiful black women. So gentlemen, we DO NOT abandon our sistas when things get tough, and especially when they need us the most. We love them through it, we support them through it, and we protect them through it! #BlackMenStandUpForBlackWomen A post shared by David Adefeso (@david.adefeso) on Jun 10, 2019 at 6:31pm PDT
View this post on Instagram When all u know and felt is hurt. You hurt. Self inflicted and to others are included. From my sisters, the ladies of the real, Iyanla, old and new Friends and whomever else I’ve EVER hurt, from being hurt. Please forgive me. I didn’t know love to show you love. Now I do thanks to my @david.adefeso 🌟 A post shared by Tamar Braxton ❤️ (@tamarbraxton) on Jun 10, 2019 at 7:35pm PDT
